Wednesday, September 17, 2008

The News!

So in case you haven't been paying close enough attention lately, I've got some news updates for you.

1) Today is "No Pants Wednesday". That's right, take 'em off. This is the best news you're going to get on my list today.

2) "It's about time we got a HOT V.P." - that is a quote from a fox news reporter. I heard it on the radio yesterday morning on the way to work, and I've decided that I'm officially bored with this election. Does anybody know where Ralph Nader went?

3) "It is a myth that lack of exercise makes you fat." I stumbled upon this new diet while checking my email. Evidently the most important thing you can do to lose weight is time your meals properly. It doesn't matter what you eat, or if you even move at all.

4) Mickey Rourke is finally making his leading man comeback as Randy "the ram" Robinson in "The Wrestler"

Well, that's all I have for you today. Stay tuned for more urgent updates as they come in, and take your pants off!

-Ward

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Okay, point by point-
1. Grr! I thought it was No Pants Tuesdays-that must be why everyone was laughing at me yesterday.

2. What do they mean about time? Between Cheney and Ford we have had some SERIOUSLY HOT VPs.

3. I totally knew that exercise garbage was just that-GARBAGE. Do you remember mom's friend Sue Spivey? Thin as a whip, never exercised a day in her life.

4. What comeback? Mickey Rourke is as famous as ever in my mind.

Anonymous said...

Wow, that Sue Spivey still gives me the creeps. I tried to describe her to my wife:

A chain-smoking skeleton with skin stretched over her.

But I think that anyone who never met her just won't get it. And didn't she have an on-call psycic?

Anonymous said...

I don't know about the psycic(is that how you spell that?) but you got the rest of the description pretty close.

Man. Thinking about her gives me the creeps a little too. Remember that shack they lived in?