I know we're Lancers, but we're just not THAT close.

I love my neighbors, not all of them necessarily but I really like the people who live closest to us. They donated their dilapidated playhouse to us, they fix Ward's guitars for free, they let us come in their house when they're gone and borrow eggs and we always have dependable house/dog sitters when we go out of town FOR FREE (they have a dog with whom we do the same). They come to our house for holidays and parties, we buy from their children's fund raisers and they, being the horticulturist type, trim our shrubs and flowers when we are 8 months pregnant. We all went to the same high school even though we attended ten and twenty years apart from one another (with the exception of Ward, who was a Colonel). We are pretty close, as far as neighbors go.

Or so I thought.

Recently, like yesterday, a friend of mine told me that her neighbor went into labor. She hadn't seen or spoken to the new parents but she had spoken with another neighbor who had told her all the details. How did she know all the details, why she was in the room, how else (OK, I understand someone could have told her but I am looking for dramatic effect here people). But she wasn't the only neighbor who attended the birth, two others did as well.

As stated before, I really like my neighbor's, but I also like privacy. When I gave birth it was a family only ordeal and when I mean family it was Ward and I. I would have perhaps had more people in the room (my sister) but I just felt too uncomfortable about how the situation could end up (like it did, emergency c-section at 5 a.m.). But my neighbors, they were never on the attendance list. I did see my neighbor when I was in labor, but only to my surprise on the hospitals Epidural video. I like privacy, I don't tell many people about the origins of my children's existence, I didn't tell people I was pregnant until my second trimester or that I was pregnant with twins until I had passed the twenty week miscarriage date and I certainly don't invite them to my deliveries. I know, I am the one with issues.

I know a lot of people though, who embrace a lot of people attending the miraculous event that is childbirth but now that I have both attended one and been responsible for one I feel even more the need for privacy in the delivery room. I don't mean that parents, siblings, or other close people should be kept from the delivery, I just think that it is not a place for friends and acquaintances. Things can happen without any warning and I just have to wonder is it really a good idea to have so many people in attendance? My doctor would only allow Ward and one other person in the room, I am sure that was mainly for her liability purposes but I don't think it is such a bad policy.

I think that mainly for me it is that I am a controlling person. I like to be in control and giving birth is one time when I felt that I was only in partial control of the situation (until the c-section when I felt I lost all control of the situation). But what do you think, am I just being weird? I have watched those birthing stories on TLC, I would just never want to be on their show.

-june

I was given full permission to tell this story, no names or other information have been disclosed, mainly because I didn't get any other information, it seemed too private.

Playground Update #3

BEHOLD!

The Dragon Tower!

It's My Birthday and I'll Cry If I Want To

This morning my neighbor stopped in to see if I wanted to go to the auction being held two doors up, the children were napping and Ward agreed to stay home so I went with her and her daughter to be nosy and see who are new neighbors perhaps might be and to see how much the house, built the same times as ours, would go for.

How much did the house go for? $150K!

Reasons to be depressed:

1.) Our neighborhood seems to be going to pot.

2.) We own not one but TWO houses in our neighborhood.

3.) We may never sell either of the two houses, I can sit on that second house for 10 years before I take a $225K loss.

4.) The US economy may really be in a depression, not just a recession.

The real estate agent assured me that the house will not go for that little, that the bank will refuse to sell it at that, but I am not convinced. And so what if the house doesn't go for $150K if it goes for uner $300K that is a hit as the house is on par if not a little under the house we are trying to sell.

You would cry to if it happened to you.

-Leslie Gore

Life and Whatnot.

Having twins. That is the easy part. Trying to do anything else, that is the hard part. Anytime I manage to do anything other than care for the twins and write a post, I am ecstatic.



This weekend, I was in ecstasy.



I managed to do housecleaning on Friday. And attend a ball game. I slept several hours.



Saturday I woke up early, took the twins for a walk with my siblings and nephew and went to Panera for breakfast. Then I went to Sam's, Target, Kohl's back to Target, Goody's and the grocery store. I was in desperate need of Groceries and on a wild goose hunt to find my sister a birthday gift, a particularly cute frame for which I cannot remember where I first saw it and have since to find it.



I then went home, ate unhealthily for lunch and unpacked the car. We straightened the house, the main floor had so much clutter I contemplated going back to Sam's and purchasing an 'OPEN' sign and opening shop. I decided instead to move the mass amount of clutter to my bedroom and shut the door. I waited all afternoon for our guests to arrive promptly at 'noonish' as per their email. At 4p.m. they called and said they were running a little late. I love how people can be so thoughtful. But anyways, I made potato salad and waited.



In the evening we went to my sister's where we celebrated her birthday (presentless I am afraid) and my brother called to tell me that he and Lucy's plans for prom had been slightly delayed (fortnately they were able to show up very fashionably, yet late). Our friends, Fawn and Jason, whom were staying the weekend at our house with their boys MJ, Doc and Mr. T. finally showed up at about 7:30, about the time we had to leave to get our children home and in bed. My sister's friend from high school was in town to see my sister and she had made her a birthday cake. Turns out, I don't really care much for Milk cake.



We came home and put the twins down and went back downstairs to wait for the family to show up. We made deviled eggs (how does anyone accomplish peeling a hard boiled egg successfully I would love to know). We made brownies for a chocolate trifle and brownies with marshmallows. At around 11 p.m. their family showed up. We showed them were they would be staying and talked for a while. At 1 a.m. Ward and I decided to have a banana bread cookoff. We would make banana bread using whatever ingredients we had and see whose tasted better. I used bananas and heavy whipping cream and vanilla and pecans along withother normal ingredients and he used cinnamon and walnuts and chocolate chips and brown sugar and well we cooked them and tasted them and you know what? It turns out you can put just about anything you want into banana bread, it tastes the same. The chocolate chips were truly the only noticably difference. We stayed up baking and talking with Jason and Fawn until 3:30.



At 3:40 Coop woke up hungry. At 6:30 Coop woke up hungry. At 7 Bailey woke up hungry.



We didn't sleep much. By 8 am Sunday Ward was out mowing the grass. At 10 when Jason and Fawn came up they made fun of us for being up so early, as if we had a choice. They have a baby, Mr. T, who was born February 2nd and I don't know how they got anymore sleep than we did, except I guess we have two.



Sunday morning we made a trifle, baked beans, mac and cheese, and pound cake. At 2 p.m. we had a cookout, for which almost everyone invited came and came on time. I was running the taddest bit behind. Showers always seem last minute and extremely rushed for me. I had a great time at the cookout, as I hope all who attended did. I love having all of the kids here and there were so many babies here as well. Our neighbor brought one of those blow up bouncy things and the kids had a great time.



Most people left pretty early, by 8 or so and we cleaned up. Then we sat around reading Robert Munsch books and talking about children. At 1 am I excused myself and went to bed, I don't know how some people can stay up all night and function well the next day.



Monday our guests stayed until 3 pm and then in the afternoon I had my family over for a 'leftovers cookout' for which I made more beans and mac and cheese and now I have more food than I did before the 'leftovers cookout'. The babies went to bed rather early, out by 7 p.m. so Ward and I went out and cleaned our garage up, entirely. Folks, I am proud to say that our garage, for the first time in over a year, has two cars parked in it again. Those of you here for the cookouts this weekend probably wouldn't even recognize it. You would walk in and think you had entered someone elses house, except for the dogs barking at you.



We then watched a movie and wrote a review.



This morning I have moved a treadmill, but not walked on one. I have recleaned almost everything cleaned on Friday and feel that with a little bit of pressure I can get almost anything done.



The twins had a pretty good weekend, someone was holding them constantly (our friends like babies way more than my extended family does). They have been a little unhappy this morning that I can't hold them both all morning. They are napping and where as I should be folding and sorting back up laundry, I came to journalize the weekend and explain to you that I had a very busy weekend but nothing really happened.



Wow, you must be thinking, all this to tell us nothing really happened.



I know, I know.



Today I begin packing for our upcoming busy weekend.



-june

So I Mowed The Lawn

And I learned a few things while I was out there for two hours mowing the lawn.

1.) Our yard sucks. Not because it is big and takes forever to mow but because it is so uneven and bumpy that you ache all over when you are done.

2.) Despite the fact that our yard sucks, I really like to mow. Keep in mind that we have a riding lawn mower that does 90% of the work and what I really enjoy is the fresh air, the time to think and the chance to listen to my iPod.

3.) I like all of our neighbors less and less. I am becoming less of a people person or our neighbors are just becoming increasingly annoying in all directions.

4.) I love this song. Not the band so much, but I love this song.

I LOVE Spring!!

Today the twins and I went on a visit into my hometown to see a friend from high school's newly remodeled kitchen. They did all the work themselves and she has been dying for me to come and see it. It looked really good, better than I was expecting actually. They did all the work themselves, tearing out old cabinets, installing the new ones, staining the cabinets, coutnertops, tile backsplash.

Anyways. I have a tendency to start a post about one thing and talk about something else so now that that little tangent is over let me tell you what I thought about on the 45 minute drive. As if you really care.

First, I thought about going to Arizona later on this year and how in the world we are going to travel with little babies. When are we going to travel? How are we going to afford it thanks to constantly rising fuel and airline prices? But I still really want to do it. Any survival tips? I would love to hear 'em.

Secondy, I thought about how much I love this time of year. I love the weather. You know, that long sleeve t-shirt and shorts, get out the flip flops weather that we here in Virginia only see for a short time. Well, it is here and I love it. If the temperature outside would only stay 75 degrees I would be pleased. But it won't.

I love the smells. Yes, that right, the we finally cut our grass-flowers are in bloom smell. That quiz I took where I said Cookies were my favorite smell-I misspoke. The smell of cut grass is perhaps truly my favorite because this is my favorite season. Next to shopping season in the mid-fall/early-winter anyways.

I love that it's staying lighter outside later into the day. Last night when we put Trauma and Trouble to sleep it was still light out. I could have mowed the grass, but we watched 'There Will Be Blood' instead (*****). I love that when I got home from Romp N' Roll our neighbors, the only ones I like, were outside putting seed and straw down in one of our continued desperate attempts to grow grass on this horrible soil in the neighborhood. I like these neighbors and now that it is actually light out when they get home from work I can chat with them again in the evenings. We tend to be summer buddies.

I love that it's cookout season. I love having people over and with the deck addition we can now have more people over and maybe more often?

I was watching my friends son jump on their trampoline and I was thinking about all of the wonderful things to come in the years ahead with children. Her oldest son's T-Ball season starts up this Saturday. I look forward to all these things that will run me ragged.

And I drove home thinking about all the things that I want to do outside. Clean the garage. Plant grass seed and fertilize. Mow the grass again. Kill the wasps that are already accumulating. Wash the vehicles. Yes, I know we have small children (yes, i heard you whispering 'good luck with that' to your computer screen like i couldn't hear ya). Now, where did I put those carrier thingamajigs?

It's the most wonderful time of the year.

Don't you agree?

-june

Whatever Happened to Chester?

We have been in our house now for almost two years. It has gone by very fast.

When we were building the house the neighbor on the hill, he wouldn't even wave at us if we waved at him. He thought we were laborers. His name is Billy. Our subs, they kept hitting his mailbox. He had mean words with Ward about it even though we told them right away we would replace the mailbox (and the stupid things are not easy to replace because the Homeowners Association picks them out and has someone make them out of iron, but they are done so cheaply and cost a fortune). Then we were asked not so nicely to never ever park any vehicle that had anything to do with construction or us in general to park on their grass which isn't really theirs but the county's. EVERY day I had to keep no crossing tape up to keep people from parking on the grass. One day while fixing the tape I lost my keys.

I assumed in their grass, but I couldn't find them. Billy has a son. He is bizarre. During construction he would 'dumpster dive' into the huge dumpster on the site. I would bring some of our trash from our old house and put it in the dumpster. One day little kid, we will call him Damien because he reminds me of the kid from 'The Omen' asked Ward if he could "go dumpster diving just one more time?" For some reason Ward said yes. A few days later I saw him in his yard playing with some of my things. It was really strange. So anyways, I thought maybe little Damien took my keys. So I went over there to see.

I am walking up their very long driveway and Billy turns and looks at me like 'what are you doing coming into my yard you lazy construction filth'. He doesn't even walk towards me, he just stands there waiting for me to walk up to him. I tell him who I am and that I have lost my keys fixing the yellow tape.

"What do you mean you're building the house next door?" He asks. He cares more about my introduction than the fact that I can't find my keys. I tell him we're building the house and he looks at me confused. Again, he asks what I mean, like are we going to be residing across the street from him? Yes! "What about the people with the Cadillac?"

My mother-in-law's boyfriend drives a Cadillac and they came by very often during the construction phase. Billy took one look at Ward's old F-150 and my KIA and figured there was no way we could afford a house like this, no, it had to be the people with the Cadillac's house.

"I yelled at your husband about my mailbox. I didn't know he was the owner."

So you see it's OK to treat people like dirt if they are just the ones constructing the nice house but not if they are going to be the owners. He asked if he could come over and see our house. He kept going on about how nice it was and kept asking about the people who owned the Cadillac. He probably thought they were paying for the house or something but I don't really care.

He was never friendly again if you could call that one encounter friendly and I don't.

Flash forward a few weeks. We have moved in. We sell our old house and finally bring our three cats (actually our third cat Crookshanks was picked up at the dumpster right after we moved in, she was pregnant with kittens and we are fools) and two dogs to the new house.

Our two cats, Sammy Davis Baker Jr. and Chester Copperpot, they are both black and white. They are cats. If you have ever owned a cat you know that you don't OWN a cat they OWN you. And they do as they please and they come when they want. Anyways, Chester had always been a little odd (his story is long and a blog for another day) and would disappear for days. As soon as we brought him here he disappeared for a few days. Sam is really needy and befriends all children. He seeks them out, especially little girls and has been fortunate enough to find himself residing in houses beside little girls his whole life. Maybe he thought Damien was a little girl.

One afternoon about a week after the cats came home to live here I get a knock at my front door. I open the door to find Damien standing there (the kid is all of 9 or 10) in his Sunday best. It was Tuesday. He is blinking his eyes over and over and over...

As he's blinking his eyes he says to me and I will never forget it because of the bizarreness of the whole interchange:

"Are your parents here?" he asks blinking rapidly and looking like he is going to try and sell me something.

"No, actually they are out."

"Um, do you have a blue cat?"

"Uh, no. I have black and white cats." I respond as I am thinking about the way this kid is blinking and wearing clothes that little kids don't normally wear.

"Can you get it to stay over here? It keeps coming in our yard and rolling around on the grass. My dad told me to come over here and ask you if we should take it to the dump or"

At this point my curiosity has turned to anger that this kid and his father are plotting how to kill my cats and do away with the evidence but have been decent enough to give me fare warning and that is exactly what they were aiming for, a warning, a threat and I say in my not so nice tone:

"I will take care of my cat thank you."

And I shut the door on Little Damien.

Now I know I am an adult and he is a little kid but he is scary and I just couldn't stand there at the door any longer listening to him or I might have gone mad. I was very angry and I thought about going up there to their house and giving their whole family a piece of my mind but I am as big a wuss as I am an over-reacter so I let it go.

I never did anything with the cats. They hate to be inside, especially Chester.

And then shortly thereafter, Chester went missing. I have never been able to get the thought out of my mind that Hilly Billy's family had something to do with my cat's disappearance.

They have a little dog, we sometimes joke that we are going to take him out. But we are animal lovers and are only joking. The little Damien, he throws rocks at the pint sized animal. I feel sorry for it.

The Devil, I mean Damien, didn't have my keys and maybe he didn't have anything to do with Chester's disappearance but I still think the kid is pure evil.

-june

p.s. Maybe Crookshanks was a botched attempt at "dumpster delivering" a cat and our neighbors are mad about it.