I've got to admit it's getting better, a little better all the time.

Before I had Sean I had some extra weight I was carrying around that I really didn't need anymore that I was looking to get rid of. Just as I got serious about the idea though, I learned I was pregnant and pregnancy is no time to be trying to unload extra weight. So I happily packed on more weight where there was already plenty.

But as soon as Sean was born I was determined to lose the 35 lbs I had gained since having the twins, both pregnancy weight and cherry-coke-with-a-side-of-frozen-burrito weight. With six weeks of being very diligent I have at long last lost those 35 lbs. They must make me look quite a bit different because at every turn I have people asking me what am I doing to lose 'all that weigh'.

Well the first thing I am doing? Not drinking 1200 calories of Cherry Coke a day. Seriously folks, I am an addict and I was drinking more than half the calories a person should consume a day in sugary soda. I would love to tell you that I have given up soda completely...but I'm an addict. I have switched to diet soda and because it doesn't taste quite as good I am naturally drinking less soda overall.

Secondly, I am running. I am really, really, really, trying harder than ever before to be a runner. Yesterday I jogged and ran for 35 minutes without stopping. That is a personal record for me. I am slowly but surely overcoming the "I can't run" mentality. I don't run very fast, but one thing at a time please.

Thirdly, I am watching what I eat. I am trying to choose whole wheat bread over white bread. Low sodium over higher sodium. Sticking to portion sizes. I am eating BMLT's (Fake bacon, mayonnaise, lettuce and tomato) at lunch, (yes, mayonnaise is bad but a girl has to have a little taste in her food) or a cheese sandwich. I am trying to choose healthy snacks like apples and hard boiled eggs over cheese sticks and cookies. But it's hard. Hard. Especially for me. I love food, good food, bad for you food. I think healthy food is often a waste of my time and that I would rather just not eat. But I have to consume enough calories to not harm my milk production and I need to set a good example for my three kids, especially in a world where our waistlines are increasing on average all the time. So I am trying to eat healthy just as hard as trying to become a runner.

However, it isn't easy and I feel as though what I am eating is consuming too many of my thoughts because it isn't natural for me to eat such health consciously. And sometimes, I will admit, I fall of the wagon so to speak. Last night, after a fairly healthy course of meals I had fried french fries. Yes, Erin, the Deep Fryer was not yet put away and we feel drawn to it like magnets on a fridge. And then afterwards, a Ghiradelli brownie which is the epitome of my sinful indulgences.

So I was feeling a little guilty this morning. I didn't even sit in for my weekly weigh in, I might not even be down 35 lbs anymore. That's why at 6 a.m. I emptied the deep fryer, soaked it, scrubbed it and put it away in the back of a cabinet. I should have put it with the Goodwill stuff but alas I'm not Jillian Michaels, I'm me and I like fried foods occasionally, so shoot me.

But I have to think I'm moving in the right direction. And when people ask me what I'm doing differently, I tell them 'everything'. It seems to be the only way.