Wednesday, October 14, 2009

Wanted: Time Machine

Lately I have been struggling with balance. I haven't fallen over the dog or tripped down the stairs, but I am finding I just don't have time for everything I want to do and I can't decide whether to just try harder, go faster or re-prioritize.

Since having Sean I have read no more than two books a month and I am in two book groups, so that doesn't leave me a lot or room. I take pictures but never seem to download them or open up my computer software to play with them. I am baking and cooking more but I am mopping my floor in sections just to get it clean. I want to run, but I want to have a nice hot bath afterwards, there just isn't time for it all. No matter how I plan my day there a tons of surprises and often things take longer than I ever thought they would.

I wish I had more hours in my day. I wish I didn't have to sleep. I wish I had a time machine. Or even better a time turner like Hermione Granger, an extra hour here or there is truly all I ask. I know that as a mom of three, especially three this little, that I should be happy that I get to do anything for myself, but I want to believe that I can do it all; that I can be a great mom and be good to myself.

I am spending time every day considering how to manage all my interests with my responsibilities. I will admit that I would rather do the things I enjoy (baking) over the things that have to get done (cleaning). The other night I decided I would bake my Zucchini Bread and while it was baking I would mop the floors. Then Sean had a bout of Colic or Gas or just all around fussiness and I ended up sitting on the bed with him until we both fell asleep. No bread for breakfast, no clean floors. But then he won't be this little for long and his smiles are far more enjoyable than clean rooms or fresh baked goods, so what's the problem?

The problem is, I still want to read a good book, try out a new recipe, run at the park, and capture the leaves turning. And I feel guilty whenever I choose these things and let the ring around my tub remain.

So I want to know, how do you do it all? What if anything do you sacrifice? What do you wish you had more time to do? If I find a time machine on e-bay, do you want to go 50-50?

3 comments:

James said...

I'd go 50-50 in a heartbeat.

Getting By Day by Day said...

I'll tell you how you do it... pick your battles. :-) You deserve "me" time! I have 4 (yes FOUR) children! I'm 32. I had my first 12 years ago and my fourth 4 years ago. The other two are 10 and 7. The two oldest are boys, two youngest are girls. I tend to have a very hard time with "me" time. Not in getting the "me" time... just using it to MY advantage! LOL I have to actually make myself buy something new for ME once in a while and not feel guilty (I think that comes from years as a single parent, though). Now I'm lucky to have an amazing fiance (getting married at the end of 2009!!!!). But, seriously, it's ok to let that darn housework go so you can have time with your baby AND time for you! :-)

Shraddha@theselfloveproject said...

its tough! i can relate!!

i wish i knew what the right answer was..i don't

following you via friends follow friends group mbc..i hope you will reciprocate the follow..